Tuesday, October 31, 2006

INTERNAL AFFAIRS!!!

It's that time of the day when your vision becomes hazy and you begin to see 2 objects instead of 1... Naaaah, it aint 11pm, it's 2.30 pm on a dull afternoon with my damager, oops, manager keeping a constant watch on me... Aaaaaaaaa b@llz to him... Let me continue with my post!!!
Here goes ...

Today, after lunch, Karthik and myself were chattering away to glory(as usual) much to the dispair of Chubby and Sibin who had to listen to us patiently.. (Raghavendra - Chubby's tech lead was snoring away to glory under the coconut tree)... And as usual we come up with some topic that would leave me nostalgic. Oh yes, today we spoke about the days in college we were at our notorious best... I'm talking about the days in college when we had internals...

Cut to Semester 1, somewhere in 2001, when Deepak and Hari struck a deal with chemistry lab budda (translated as "old man" for those who are unfamiliar with these jargon)... The chemistry internal paper cost us a hefty sum of Rs 50.. (oh i almost forgot, we made quite a bit of profit out of this. Half the class parted with Rs 5 each for the paper and we ended up with the question paper plus a profit of 100 bucks and I'm sure NR Bhat and Suraj would want their money back on hearing this)...

Cost of Question Paper: Rs 50
Cost of Xerox: Rs 20
The look on the lecturer's face when he sees me scoring 25/25 without attending a single class: PRICELESS!!!!

And the fact that we did it again for our second internals just proved that the first one was no accident!

This was just the beginning of our 4 year course which saw us face about 100 internals. And at the end of it all coming out unscathed, if you can call it that.
By the end of the first semester copying was almost a unwritten rule. And it wasn't that we were looking down upon people who actually studied. We needed such people. We needed a source as well!!!

Second semester saw most of us reaching college an hour or two before the internals. (something that was conspicuously absent during regular classes). The fear of losing a seat next to the topper (or someone who had studied for that subject) got our asses going early in the morning. Oh yes, the 3 hour gap between internals were very well utilized. We saw many emerging soccer stars from our class, your's truly included. (I had to mention this :) )

In the third semester there was a new revelation in the form of Harikrishnan S. I vaguely remember Deepak whispering "resistance b/w tracks" or "electromagnetic induction" or some such thing during the ECET (One screw#d up subject) and till date God knows what Hari saw in those two phrases. He went on to write a novel in the given 1 hour span that would have made Sidney Sheldon or Jeffrey Archer proud. (God save the evaluator if he ever evaluated that paper).

We met Sriram aka Kunta (a third class rascal from Info Science dept) somewhere in the middle of the fourth semester and he was one step ahead of all of us. A true engineer that he was he made use of the existing technology, Solar energy, Lunar energy etc etc and all the other non-descript energies in the world and came out with a path breaking innovation... "DATA IMPRESSION"... Sounds Hi-Fi, but the ground reality was that it was just a simple and effective way of using pressure of the ball point pen (supposed to be another great invention..but this time not by any one of us) and writing the answers without actual ink.
At this point of time, I must mention that there were some loud shouts of protest from Archana, Nisha and Shilpa (Angels (of charlie's angels fame) - we call them, though they are not what we call them, rather the opposite). Oh yes, ethics and values were their key points!! Despite the vociferous protests, we actually implemented it and it worked out very much to our favour. To anyone who said "Honesty pays" our question was simple "By cash or kind".

From the fifth sem onwards it was a radically new approach taken. Most often there used to be a contest as to who would come out of the hall first. We saw people coming out in 3 min (a record held by me and which I thought should be mentioned... I'm bragging about myself, but hell, this is my blog, so I gotta do it). Football sessions were an integral part of the 3 hour break I mentioned earlier.

Copying became an "Art" in the truest sense. Some were gifted with it by birth. Others developed it after sheer hard work. Fudging from the text books was done only when the football sessions were absent.

Right thoughout this post there hasn't been a single of instance where I've said that I studied for the internals. I haven't mentioned it coz I dont lie and dont want to write about things I didn't do.

Enough bragging...
Some highlights of my 4 years stint:
- Sampath getting caught by KGS (goddamit, he was dumb enough not to cook up an story and instead admitted to copying..well no prizes for guessing what happened after that...KGS didn't take no pity)
- Rohit Ganguly copying word to word from Suraj...Bugger did not even leave the spelling mistakes..(Oh yes, BKV figured that out).
- Hari filling up a 40 page blue book with an input of 2 phrases from Deepak.
- Kunta running from first bench to last bench under the eyes of the so-called invigilator.
- Karthik and Purtod getting caught by MLS - our HOD (MLS conveniently neglected that coz Purtod and Karthik were kinda the most studious guys..had it been anyone else ...) for fudging right from the book.
- Me (the great) submitting an empty blue book to MLS (to think of it, I had the nerve to do it then) and walking out with a nonchalant shrug (DBMS internals) after 3 min (God knows how I survived that one).

All of us waiting for the invigilator to show up and then choosing the appropriate class room (it so happened that we used to end up 4 in a bench).
-Many more which I'm not able to recollect. If anyone remembers any other significant incident or if you so happen to just read this post and associate yourself with it and have a similar experience please feel free to post an arbit (arbitrary) comment. (Am doing some shameless advertisement :D :D )

I'd stop it here... Oo..I'M SO GONNA GET MY ASS KICKED FROM MY MANAGER!!!

One parting shot!!! HIMESH still can't sing!!!! (@Akshay - up yours!!!!! :) )

6 comments:

Nisha Nair said...

Hi Bhargav,

How can u miss the incidentS with the "Queen of ur dreams - MS" or should we remind?!!

I'm sure Kunta,Hari and the "ANGELS" wud throw light on the episode!!

Regards,
ANGELS

Bhargav said...

@akshay: Ya.. I pretty much agree with you that you did not copy in internals..Only borrowed some ideas from the person who was seated on the same plank of wood..
And as far as himesh not copying music - Himesh was sued by some unknown, unheard guy for lifting the tune of Gela Gela from the movie Aitraaz. (that guy won the case as well...) Every music composer copies music.. The only thing is that Himesh's sources are quite arbit and unheard of..

@nr bhat: Thanks once again.

@nisha, shetty, shilpa aka the angels:
The so-called incidents with the Queen of my dreams and the Apple of my eye i.e. MS will be highlighted in one of my next few blogs..
But dont you feel too happy about it... Nisha: Ur Mr.Right will also feature in that. Shetty: Left-right, Zombie etc will also be present.. Shilpa: If u by chance think that i am going to forget your name, Garu and Chaitanya Hegde will be topping the list..I'll be back with a vengeance..As Kunta says "If i'm going down, i'll take everyone with me" (That was a dialogue from F.R.I.E.N.D.S)..And all these days I thought that was his creativity.. :)

Deepak said...

Awesome write up dude...and .|.. to Himesh.

Bhargav said...

@Deepak: Thanks dude.. .|.. to Himesh as well..

@Sachin: Thanks mate... Hope to see more of your posts... But as far as my studies for internals are concerned, I haven't exaggerated.

@Hari: 1)This post was specially intended for the amount of fudging in internals..(Rather the timepass we used to do in internals)...Football will feature as a separate post..There's so much to it...
2) Sorry about cricket. Missed out that one.. Apologize profusely.
3) As far as my "lady love" is concerned,(first of all, that was not my lady love..It was a horrible blunder) u'd better not rake up that issue in a public forum... Else, I'll have to let the world know about your sexual preferences..

dharmu said...

cool mari, some awesome writing on college days. i guess this runs in the family, er, not the blogging part re, its about "not writing" exams part.

btw, donno if i have told you, but in my 2PU, i came of my bio mid-term exams, coz i was getting late for kaho na pyaar hai movie.

and my UNI days of blissful bunking, often has me wondering who the heck i did my MBA, and how the heck did i land my arse in US of A.

sadly to inform, ill be back early next year, to join the UNI to work on my PhD. wondering if i can bunk classes then???

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